I'd Like to Go All Postal or a Tale of Homeland Insecurity

Ok, so Monday I finally checked into why we still haven't received out passports since we applied for it on December 11. I call the U.S. Passport Agency and say whats up? and they say the passports were mailed on December 30th and here is the USPO tracking number #0004675982640916784.

I take this number to my local post office and they send me to the substation the substation says: duh, it was delivered here at 6:53 a.m. January 5th and delivered at 7:21 to your box. That is unlikely. It takes longer to drive to my rural p.o. box than that. I go back to the substantion four times trying to get some help, they say the satellite is down, they will send a supervisor out, the supervisor says we don't do that! What the hell, does anyone give a damn? I called the contract carrier, all emotional, a woman I know and like, she has her son deliver the mail, she spoke to him and all I heard in the background was double talk, she came back to the phone and said; "we we don't know what happened to your passports," and suggested I have the post office check in the certified mail or express mail bin. I went back again, the worker at the substation looked in the baskets and did not find them.
I went back to the post office and spoke to the Post Mistress who looked at me and my rant with an appropriate espression of understandingand making placating noises. She said they will look in all the boxes again. This was the 6th trip to the post office and numerous calls to the passport agency. Yesterday I called the Post Mistress back and she says with her understanding monotone voice that spoke she to John and they still can't find them still yatta, yatta, yatta. I'm going to puke. Why is this happening to me?

So Friday January 30th we came back to the post office and filed a DS-89 lost or stolen passport form and reapplied for new passports and opened a new p.o. box downtown.

In the meantime can anyone please tell me,

were the f--k are our passports????